Klosterman unimpressed with "Chinese Democracy"

Chuck Klosterman's review of the new Guns N' Roses album "Chinese Democracy" is up on Spin Magazine's web site and in the latest issue. He thinks it would have been a better album had it come out a few years earlier and with less "maniacal perfectionism" on the part of Axl Rose. I especially like this quote:

"The Blues" might be Rose's crowning career achievement: It's an epic combination of mid-period Stevie Wonder, early Elton John, and side two of In Through the Out Door. This is the kind of gutter-glam boogie ballad that makes "November Rain" seem like a bucket of burro vomit warming in the afternoon sun.

and this informative one:

Several songs make thinly veiled references to the architect who designed Rose's backyard topiary garden, a move that may confuse casual listeners.

Don't miss the "Fast Facts" section at the end of the review, for more insight on the lengthy production time for this long-awaited album. I'm not sure I'll buy it, unless I receive an unexpected gift of Monopoly money.

Gene Weingarten breaks down Bob Dylan

A few weeks back in his Washington Post chat, Gene Weingarten polled the readers about Billy Joel's "Piano Man." He asked his readers to rate the best and worst lines in the song, among other questions about its merits. In Tuesday's chat, Gene tried the same trick with Bob Dylan's "Ballad of a Thin Man," from Highway 61 Revisited. Gene's analysis is about halfway down the transcript -- search for the phrase "Okay, the poll". I'd never really thought about the meaning behind this song, and I'm not saying Gene's got it right, but when I listened to it on the way home today and thought about what he wrote, he's got a pretty good sense of the song. The discussion of the song, and by extension Bob Dylan's talent, reminded me that Highway 61 Revisited is quite possibly one of the best albums ever recorded, and certainly one of my favorites. Has any artist ever had as productive a stretch as Dylan had in the mid-1960s, when he released Bringing It All Back Home, Highway 61 Revisited, and Blonde on Blonde back-to-back-to-back? I don't know if there's a bad song on any of those three albums.

Cranky old guy hates Starbucks

I meant to post this last week, when it first appeared on Gawker. There's a guy who has a website called "The Kid From Brooklyn" and Gawker linked to this video clip of him ranting about the price of Starbucks coffee, the accompanying snacks one might consume at a Starbucks, and the general ambience of the world's favorite coffee conglomerate.

I love cranky old men. I look forward to being one someday. Well, the old part at least. I'm already cranky enough.

Bill Paxton's Naked Hour

It seems Jess and I aren't the only ones who think HBO's new show "Big Love" exists purely as an excuse for Bill Paxton to show his bare ass to millions of TV viewers (fourth item). And in the pilot, we got a quick glimpse of "Little Bill," just so you know.

Coconuts Wednesday

I can't believe that I have to miss this event today while I'm at work. It's like Tuba Christmas, only completely different. Although I didn't like Spamalot as much as I would have hoped, I'd still love to go to this party.

a different kind of busy this week

The massive rollout we've been prepping for is finally getting under way this week at work. Early versions of the work schedule had us working six days a week, 15 hours a day, in shifts. Now the schedule is down to five days a week and only 12 hours, still in shifts. Since I didn't know just how bad things might get this week, I held off making any plans for my evenings. And my forethought has been rewarded, as I got tapped to be the evening support this week until 9 PM. It's not that bad a deal: I get a free dinner, a cab ride home, and I can sleep in a little bit in the mornings and come in later. However, the times do remind me of the ugly e-mail upgrade I ran six years ago at another job, which had a similar schedule and drove me to look for work elsewhere. I'm not in charge of this rollout, though; I just have to hang out and answer the phone if they need me. So I'm not afraid of this rollout forcing me to start a job search. And it's only for this week -- next week someone else will get the late shift.

With my new marching orders, Monday night was the only night this week that I got to cook dinner for myself. I wanted some comfort food, but not any of my usual easy dishes. A few weeks ago we were supposed to have a tater tot casserole for the Oscar party, but since the people who were going to bring that didn't come to the party, I missed out. But the idea stuck in my head, so tonight I threw together some ground beef, mushroom soup, green beans, tater tots and cheese and baked it. When I took a bite, I thought, "mmm...tastes like middle America." It was good, in a red-state sort of way. Hey, I don't have to be a gourmet every damn night. And there's enough left over for two lunches this week.

I'm more than a little excited that Georgetown is in the Sweet 16 for the first time in 10 years. I should get out of work on Friday just in time to see their next game, vs. Florida. My official bracket is a mess, but I did have Georgetown getting this far and facing Florida. That and $1.50 gets me a cup of coffee.

I love a slow Friday

There's not much to do this afternoon, so I guess it's cool that I got to watch the Georgetown-Northern Iowa game at my desk. (Hoyas win, 54-49!) I walked past my boss's desk, and he was reading a magazine. Now I'm just counting the minutes until I can get out of here for the weekend. Next week we've got a major project getting under way. While I'm told that we won't have to work late hours, I'm preparing myself for the worst.

It's also St. Patrick's Day. My neighborhood wasn't busy when I left, but there were signs it will be a madhouse when I get home. Aside from the usual holiday revelers, there's a movie filming on my block today. I'm going to do my best to avoid all of that mishegoss, and go to establishments that have no connection to the Irish, the holiday, or the Catholic church. Hopefully I won't have to step over any drunks to get to my apartment.

strange late-night thoughts

I'm sitting here re-reading some journals I wrote many years ago. Maybe it's because of the lateness of the hour, or the state of affairs in my own head, but I just realized that my entire career in information technology hinged on the interview I had twelve years ago for a student technical assistant job in Georgetown's IT department. I had been hung over for two days after an ill-fated attempt to mix cheap vodka and Sprite, hadn't shaved in at least that time, and I showed up for the interview in a t-shirt and jeans. (I was a student at the time, but still.) I have no idea how I was coherent enough to convince them I was right for the job, but they gave it to me anyway. Had I not been offered that job, I would have been forced to take a administrative assistant position instead that wouldn't have offered me the opportunity to work on the university computer systems. I might have ended up a lawyer after all.

not so busy this week

It's NCAA Tournament week. Georgetown is back in the tournament for the first time in five years, though I'd hoped they'd do better than a 7 seed. I haven't finished filling out my bracket yet, and since I left my copy at work, I guess that will be my Wednesday evening activity. The tournament doesn't really get started until Thursday (I don't count Tuesday night's "opening round"/play-in game).

Things have been a little slow around here, or at least the things I'm willing to write about publicly. Hence the lack of posts. But I am still alive. I'd better be, or else my cats wouldn't have anyone to be crazy around.

Natalie Portman will f**k you up

For the first time in months, I skipped SNL this weekend. I didn't watch a minute of it, didn't record it, barely gave it a thought. Thankfully, the Internet provides what I missed. This is freakin' awesome.

quick test post...

... to see if Blogger comments now show up

a busy week

While I don't mind spending my evenings at home watching TV and relaxing, sometimes it's fun to go out and do something different on a weeknight. I didn't plan to spend every night this week out on the town, but that's the way things have gone. The only ones who seem to mind are my cats, as you'll see.

On Tuesday, a friend e-mailed me asking if I wanted to see George Clinton and the P-Funk All-Stars at B.B. King's that night. I love the funk, and I try not to miss the Mothership when it lands, so I readily accepted. She and I met at the club around 6:30, so we had time to get a table, eat dinner, talk for a while, and then had seats for the show. The band was excellent as always, and at this point, seeing them for the fifth time, I was able to sing along with most of the songs. We sat a few tables away from Ed Bradley, who looked like he was having a good time. I sent a tip to Gawker, and made this week's "Gawker Stalker" column (see the next-to-last entry). George must be getting old, because the show started around 8:30 and ended about 11:30. One time I saw him at B.B. King's and the show went over four hours. No "Maggot Brain" this time around, but they made up for it by playing "One Nation," "Flashlight," and "Atomic Dog" among many other songs.

On Wednesday night, I went to see Brokeback Mountain with another friend. I thought the movie was worthy of the praise and recognition it's received, though it was a bit long. And no one ate pudding. Heath Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal were both fantastic, especially Ledger. I think Phillip Seymour Hoffman's going to win the Best Actor Oscar on Sunday night, but Ledger has a good shot at the award too.

Last night was my second trip out to Queens for karaoke. While I'm much more comfortable singing in a chorus than by myself, I thought I'd give this a shot and see if I really liked it. The only previous time I'd sung karaoke was in Jamaica, on vacation and in front of a room full of drunken strangers, and I loved it. This bar in Queens has its share of drinkers, but I've got a few new friends who love to sing and have a really good time with it. I'm a little surprised at how much fun I'm having as well. My biggest problem is finding songs that are in my range. I'm a bass or a baritone, and most pop songs are sung by tenors or baritones with high upper registers. I feel most comfortable with Tom Jones, Johnny Cash, and everyone's favorite crooner, Englebert Humperdinck. If "After The Lovin'" doesn't make the ladies swoon, nothing will. The only problem is that the bar is far enough out in Queens that it takes me about 45 minutes to get home. So when I left last night, it was close to 2 AM, and I got home around 2:45 to two cats who were annoyed that they hadn't seen me all day. This morning I spent a few minutes of quality time with Vladi to make up for my absence.

Tonight I'm going to see Capote, which will complete my Best Picture Oscar roundup. Then I'm going home to crash until the ceremony on Sunday night.

new CDs

My brother gave me an Amazon.com gift certificate for Hanukkah and I finally used it last week to buy some items from my wish list. I got Dream Theater's Octavarium, which I listened to at the gym on Saturday. It's more lyrical and less hard-core metal than their previous album, and they even use an orchestra on the last track, a 24-minute opus along the lines of "A Change of Seasons." It's not ideal workout music, but it's a good album nonetheless.

The big purchase was the Switched-On Bach boxed set. I've written about S-OB before, and it has been one of my all-time favorite albums since the first time I heard it over twenty years ago. Wendy Carlos recorded other Baroque albums on the Moog synthesizer throughout the 1970s, and this set brings them all together in one collection. I'd heard everything in the set before except for three of the Brandenburg Concertos, but not in many, many years. So listening to these CDs was like being transported back to my pre-teen years, when I was a geeky kid discovering Bach. In fact, it was a long time before I heard most of these works performed on anything other than a Moog. Even now, I'm still amazed at the range of sounds that Carlos was able to get out of this equipment nearly forty years ago. Listening to this music makes me happy in ways I can't even describe.

High School Senior Year Meme

My brother sent me this list of questions, so it ends up in the blog.

1. Who was your best friend?
I don't think I could pick just one. I had really geeky friends who were the top students, and I had a crowd of noble miscreants I hung out with on weekends. Maybe Joel, as he was my go-to friend for homework questions, discussions of school politics, and general extracurricular activities.

2. What sports did you play?
I was a manager for the football team, so I kept track of the game balls, the water buckets and the sideline setup during games, and made sure all the equipment got out to the practice field and back during the week.

3. What kind of car did you drive?
I drove my mom's '86 Toyota Corolla when I could borrow it from her. I only drove it to school a few times, mostly at the end of the year.

4. It's Friday night, where were you at?
Usually out with my friends, playing pool, trying to pick up girls at the mall or hanging out at someone's house.

5. Were you a party animal?
In a word, no.

6. Were you in the "In Crowd"?
No, although I was slightly more popular during football season, due to my affiliation with the team. Maybe I'm just remembering it that way.

7. Ever skip school?
Once, when we had a student "strike" to protest the ongoing teachers' selective strike that had disrupted school for most of the fall semester. Since the teachers would decide each day whether to strike or not, one day the students showed up at the high school with signs and pickets and refused to go into the building. We had news coverage, food, parental support, the works. The principal came out and said we were OK to strike that one day as long as we moved the protest to the middle school. So we formed a caravan of students driving their own cars two miles away to the middle school, which was on a high-traffic road and offered us much better exposure to the public. By early afternoon we were all cold and hungry (it was early November), so most of us went home. The strike continued throughout the rest of the school year and into the next, so our protest made absolutely no difference. But it was fun just the same.

8. Ever smoke?
No. I lost respect for my friends and girls I liked when I found out they smoked.

9. Were you a nerd?
Nerd, geek, dork, you name it, I fit it. I was in the top ten students in my class, took almost all AP classes, captained the quiz bowl team, and got my acceptance letter for Georgetown in December, earlier than anyone else in my class got accepted to college.

10. Did you get suspended/expelled?
No. I never even had detention. I stayed after school because I wanted to, not because I had to.

11. Can you sing the Alma Mater?
The words to the Alma Mater were printed in the student handbook, but I never heard it played so I don't know the music. The school fight song was the Notre Dame fight song, but I don't think we had our own words.

12. Who was your favorite teacher?
Mr. Pompanella, who taught AP American/European History. He treated his class like a college course, and for the most part got college-level work out of his students. And he was fond of muttering Latin phrases under his breath, knowing we couldn't understand him. Ms. Adams, my AP English teacher, is a close second, as her class was the one that inspired me to major in English at Georgetown.

13. Favorite class?
English.

14. What was your school's full name?
Westmont Hilltop High School.

15. School mascot?
A "Hilltopper", which was a ripoff of the Notre Dame mascot. I think our mascot faces the other way, probably to avoid a lawsuit. At football games during my era, a student wore a giant red & gray football costume and danced on the sidelines in front of the band.

16. Did you go to Prom?
Yes, with a friend from my Jewish youth group who came all the way from Charleston, WV for the event.

17. If you could go back and do it over, would you?
Yes. By the time I got to high school, I had figured out how to handle the relentless teasing of the students who picked on nerds like me. As a result, high school was largely free of that sort of harassment, and I was able to enjoy myself more than I had in previous grades. I loved football season and being a part of the team, albeit as a much-abused manager. If I could go back in time, I'd join the team as a sophomore, when we won a district championship, instead of the following year, when we went 4-6.

18. What do you remember most about graduation?
Playing a viola solo during the ceremony. And sweating under my robe -- the auditorium was hot and those robes were some kind of synthetic non-breathable fabric.

19. Favorite memory of your Senior Year?
Going to Pennsylvania's All-State Orchestra festival in April. I had to pass an audition to get there, and I studied the music and practiced more than ever before (or since) to get through. It was my last music festival, and I'd known many of the other musicians there for years, so it was a last hurrah for all of us.

20. Were you ever posted up on the senior wall?
Whatever that is, we didn't have it. However, after graduation my name was on the "Top Ten" plaque for my class, which should still be hanging outside the school auditorium. Future generations of Hilltoppers can look up at my name and think "who the hell was that guy?" If they notice it at all.

21. Did you have a job your senior year?
I played in the Johnstown Symphony Orchestra, which paid me about $140 a concert, enough to pay for gas and entertainment on weekends.

22. Who did you date?
No one seriously, though I did have a few dates. My only high school girlfriend was Becky Gore, who I dated the previous year. Becky, if you're out there, say hello.

23. Where did you go most often for lunch?
Because of the way my classes were scheduled, I had to eat lunch in French class. I took so many classes I didn't have time for an actual lunch in the cafeteria.

24. Have you gained weight since then?
I gained weight in college and in the years after, then lost it a few years ago. When I was home at Christmas, I found a pair of jeans in my closet that had been there since high school. I think they might fit me now.

25. What did you do after graduation?
Immediately afterwards, I went to a family graduation party at the home of my stepmother's nieces, who were my classmates. Then I played Trivial Pursuit with my geeky friends until the wee hours. Since we'd had a strike all year, we graduated on June 30 and I only had about seven weeks of summer. I spent most of that time at home hanging out at home, though I did go to Washington, DC for a few weeks to see my dad and take care of some business at Georgetown.

thoughts while watching Olympic hockey

Mike Emrick is a great hockey announcer, but he's going to blow a vein in his forehead. Whenever there's a play in front of the net, he sounds like someone is squeezing him in an uncomfortable location. I'd say that he's just extra excited for Team USA, but he's like that for every game.

The organists in the hockey arenas in Torino are AWESOME. So far in the tournament I've heard Coldplay, Led Zeppelin's "Kashmir," and Elton John's "Bennie and the Jets." And every time they play the recorded "Day-O," I wonder who changed the channel to a Yankees game.

early wake-up call for hockey

NBC, in its utter boneheadedness, is airing the Olympic mens' ice hockey games live on MSNBC and the USA network in the mornings and during the day. I missed Wednesday's games, so I set my alarm for 6:30 AM today and watched parts of two games while I got ready for work. I got to see Switzerland upset the Czech team, and part of Finland's 6-0 romp over Italy. In a possibly boneheaded move of my own, I set my DVR to record all seven hours of today's hockey on MSNBC, so I can watch it later tonight with my own homemade "tape delay." It's better than what NBC is showing in prime time. The only event on tonight's schedule that I want to see is the snowboardcross. I can live without the mens' figure skating finals, even with Johnny Weir's eccentricities. I just have to find a way to compress seven hours of hockey into three hours, so I'm not up all night.

I still remember the Nagano hockey tournament with fondness. CBS showed those games live as well, but with the time difference in Japan, they aired after midnight in the US. For several nights during the Games, I took a nap in the evening, then woke up to watch hockey overnight. I went back to bed around 5 AM and got a few more hours' sleep before going to work. Oh, to be 24 again and have that kind of energy....

BLIZZARD 2006!!!!

I've seen three blizzards in the past four years in New York. Why is it that they've all happened on weekends? I'd like to get a day off work for snow just once. In 2003 there was a blizzard over President's Day weekend. Last January we had a big snowstorm on a Saturday afternoon. And this time the snow started on Saturday night and continued into Sunday morning. We were supposed to get about a foot of snow in the city. Instead, at noon the measured snowfall in Central Park was 22.6 inches, the second-highest amount of snow ever. I went for a walk this afternoon and took my camera along. I walked over to Carl Schurz Park and saw lots of kids sledding and making snowmen, and took some serene pictures of the park and Gracie Mansion. You can see my photos in this Flickr set.

Cat Detective Fred

Gothamist has the best roundup of the different versions of the story of Fred, the undercover cat for the Brooklyn DA's office. It's a fluff story (pun most definitely intended) about a serious crime: a Brooklyn man who had little veterinary training and certainly was no doctor posed as a veterinarian and made house calls for about seven years. He got caught when one of his clients thought his sick and wounded dog hadn't been properly cared for and went to the police. Fred the cat, a former stray, got involved in the sting operation that finally nabbed the guy. Now he's a guest of the DA's office and available for future detective work. Make sure to check the links to the NY Times' story and photos. I think they've got the best version.

I'd like to see more of Fred. I think he could investigate the disappearance of many catnip mice in my apartment over the years.

One more thing

The past month has been one of the worst of my life. My marriage ended, one of my cats died, and to top it off I had a nasty cold. But the one constant throughout has been the Pittsburgh Steelers' run to a championship. The thought that if I could just get through the week I'd have another Steelers game to watch kept me going and gave me a reason to be happy, even if everything else was going to hell. So I'd like to thank the Steelers not just for winning the Super Bowl, but for giving me something to be really blissfully happy about for the past month.

And, to top things off today, #22 Georgetown rallied to beat #9 Pitt 61-58. The previous big win for the Hoyas was over Duke the day before the AFC championship game, so I thought today's win was a good omen. Now the big dance is just a month away....

GO STEELERS!!!!!!

It's two hours later, and I'm still giddy. I'm also exhausted, hoarse, and just plain drained from watching that game. The score might have been 21-10, but it was a much closer game than the score indicates, or at least it felt that way. I nearly had a few heart attacks, and during the 3rd quarter and into the 4th I had to go to the kitchen to wash dishes, I was so worked up. By coincidence or superstition or whatever, while I was working, the Steelers started turning the game around. When I ran out of things to wash, I had to go back to watching the game, and then the Seahawks made it a little more interesting. It was not a pretty game to watch, and the Steelers nearly gave it up a few times, but it doesn't matter.

THE PITTSBURGH STEELERS WON THE SUPER BOWL!!!

When the game was over, I screamed at the top of my lungs (my neighbors must think a maniac lives here) and then played the "Steelers Polka" and danced around the living room. I waved my Terrible Towel, shouted "Go Steelers!" at some passing fans, and made some celebratory phone calls to friends and family. I know *I* didn't win a championship tonight, but it's a fantastic feeling to watch my team win one. That's why I'm a fan. That's what it's all about.

I'm beyond happy that Hines Ward was the MVP. This guy was drafted the same year as Troy Edwards, only six rounds later, and despite outplaying Edwards in camp and in games, he couldn't get on the field for his first two seasons. Finally the team realized that Edwards was a bust and Ward was the real deal, and he became the big-game receiver the team had needed. Throughout his career, he's exemplified the Steeler way of playing the game. He's not flashy or brash, he just gets the job done, and in spectacular fashion.

Antwaan Randle El had that one great touchdown pass, and a few other excellent plays, but I'm surprised that nothing else came out of his nasty tackle in the first half. I thought for sure he was coming off the field on a stretcher, but not only did he get back up, he came back to make that unbelieveable touchdown pass on the run to Hines Ward. I hope the team can re-sign him, but I won't be the least bit surprised if he goes to another team. That's OK, we can always find playmakers. Same goes for Ken Whisenhunt, the offensive coordinator, who is likely to become the head coach for the Oakland Raiders. I thought Mike Mularkey's departure was a bad omen, but Whisenhunt came in and turned out to be a great offensive mind. Bill Cowher has a great record with assistants, so I'm sure we'll do OK if Whisenhunt leaves.

Speaking of Bill Cowher, I think this Super Bowl championship punches his ticket to Canton. 14 years coaching the Steelers, six AFC championship games, two Super Bowl appearances, and one title (and maybe more with this team... do I dare to dream?). He's got everything on his resume that he should need to make the Hall of Fame when he retires. And he's not done yet. The guy is only in his 40s and is now set for life with the Steelers. He could tank the next five seasons and he'll keep his job and I'll support that. He's won the big game. That's all he needed.

I can't believe that Ben Roethlisberger is not even 24 years old and he's taken the Steelers to a Super Bowl championship. Unbelieveable. I was excited when they drafted him two years ago, knowing even then that he was going to be a special player. But I had NO idea that he'd be this good this soon. He's got a long career ahead of him, and I hope it includes a few more titles for the Steelers. The AFC is a tough conference, and he's got some great quarterbacks for company -- Tom Brady, Peyton Manning, and Carson Palmer among them -- but I like his chances.

Finally, Jerome Bettis retires from pro football as a champion. What an amazing ending to what was already a Hall of Fame career. More than anyone else on the team, Jerome Bettis has been THE Steeler for ten seasons. Just a great, great guy and a fabulous football player. Congratulations, Jerome, and thanks for all those wonderful years and pounding runs through the line.

I have no idea what to do next. I'm definitely wearing my Steelers cap to work tomorrow, and I might just wear my Terrible Towel like a cape. Even now (12:35 AM), it's still draped over my shoulder. As with every year, I'm sad that the football season is over, but what a great way to go out. The party at my house was a hit again this year. James' chili was just as good, if not better, than last year, and our homemade pierogies got rave reviews. I think I scared some of my guests to the point that they'll never watch football with me again, but at least I've given them some great stories to tell their friends. I have to try to go to sleep now, but I don't think I'll be sleeping too much. I'm still keyed up. What a great, great night.

GO STEELERS!!!!!!